this is one of those nights things just come crashing down. I am feeling lonely even though i have my kids and have some friends, I still don't have him here. This is one of those situations that some people do not and will never fully understand. I thank God daily when I get to talk to my husband or at least see a post stating that he was on and was going to be busy or going to bed or whatever it maybe, because when I do not get to see those and I go a while without hearing from him I start to go crazy. Yes, I have heard from him today thankfully. I am just saying that here lately we have talked daily and I am just waiting for the time to come for me to start stressing over nothing. It happened last time and I started to feel anxious the other day and I knew deep down everything was ok but at the same time it had been a little while since I talked to him. It might seem petty to freak if I don't hear from him by a certain time just one day, but here's the thing if you even think it is really petty then you will never fully understand unless you are ever in this situation.
This is our second deployment together and his in his whole career. I love my husband so much for everything he does and support him in this. In a weird way it is almost as if him being in the military and knowing everything that he puts on the line within the year he is deployed brings us that much closer, even though at times it might seem like we are just done we are just young and still trying to get our lives to mold together. We have been through so much together and have gotten through it all and came out with two wonderful blessings. These are the times when wives will get anxious about the little things.
One main thing i know causes a lot of anxiety for wives is if they see the two men in uniform walk up to them. Really it doesn't matter what dress they are in, I mean it does because you know the severity based on it but you know either way something bad happened. Or when you go a little while without hearing from your loved one and you get and unexpected knock, you will feel your heart drop so far walking to see who it is and the joy when it is just some random person. I would rather see the mailman stand at my door unexpected at those times honestly.
This is just one of those nights I really do wish that he did not have to deploy. This too we will overcome. I always remind myself that he will be back soon. And even if, and thank God it is not, two years from now every day we are a day closer to being back together. Sometimes when we talk I almost feel as if "hello you are how far away from me pay attention to me" because when we talk we kind of run out of things to really talk about because being apart like this we don't get to talk about any and everything we have a limited amount of things that he can talk to me about and I have no clue what to talk to him about. I am all over the place playing the role of a single mom to two young children so when we start off my day talking to each other and end his night i have to tend to them and i know that he understands just as I understand that he gets bored just sitting there talking to me. I mean when i really think about it we don't really spend all day talking when he is home. We keep busy with other stuff tending to the children and him playing games and I am usually on the computer. Honestly, we really need to change that but thats just us and how we are idk if there is much to change we are happy and we have a relationship we just don't keep up each others rears like some. I mean this is a 4 year relationship so it is not like it's in the new phase of needing to be right there all the time we know we can talk to each other whenever and about anything. I love our life together and apart, more so when we are together but either way that is usually a give right.
Our daughter will tell me often how she misses her daddy and thankfully he has been able to use another soldiers comp lately so we get to see him now too which is nice. As much as he thought she wasn't much of a daddy's girl and as much as she is a mommy's girl she loves him so much and misses him just as much. I sometimes wish she was better at being able to express herself better cause it would be nice all the way around she would feel better and I would know how she was feeling. I mean i do to an extent but there is a difference between being his wife and being his child obviously so the feeling is different to have your daddy gone for a long time and not really understand it. but then again i like that she doesn't fully understand because right now it seems to be easier to just tell her daddy is at work. If she really understood what he was going through i know it would be harder on her.
I really don't know what else to say other then I really miss him and can't wait for him to return. I love you babe and I pray for the safe return of you and the guys there as well. Keep your head strong and don't let the little things get you. Your mind is one of the best things to get through this and I know we will make it through and you will be home before you know it!!
Wednesday, December 28, 2011
Tuesday, December 27, 2011
SLEEP!!
So, last week we all got thrown off on sleep after both children got a tummy bug. Started off with taking the baby into the hospital around 11 or so, which caused us to get to bed kind of late. Well, not kind of but really late. So all week it has been getting worse on the fight to get them sleeping right. Last night the baby kept waking less then a hour after getting him to bed, so in an attempt to get him sleeping better we laid on the couch. I was thinking my daughter had finally gone to bed, however about 30 mins after laying down with him and almost having him back to sleep she was out here. Come about 1 am or so i woke her up so i could get up and get the little one in his bed and get some blood flow in my lower body, as I was stuck on my back for a long period of time and laying on my back is super painful so I never fell asleep from 11 til 1. Then because Lily was woken up at that point she was awake, so we stayed awake until 3 and I was done and was ready for bed so she went to her room. I guess around 30 mins later she came in the room with me. Did not wake until noon today.
I cannot begin to explain how much it sucks to watch your day wither away but to wake up that late just completely throws my day off. My house looks like a horrible science project or something i mean there is no new anything growing ha ha but there is a lot that needs to be done. I feel overly stressed about the way it looks and kind of embarrassed. Which kind of further hinders the way i feel about doing much. Waiting for some extra energy to come on but it doesn't seem to be coming. This Thursday I will be buying D.E. and see if that will help my energy level and all that to return but who knows anymore. I just keep hoping that maybe a good night sleep will do it for me, but the kids are kind of lacking right now in sleeping well so what kind of fun is this to sleep our whole day out blah.
But on a good note we are talking about trying to get stationed back closer to family. This whole being far away from everyone and not even having my husband around just does not do it for me. At least when he is here it is nice and I don't mind being here. As soon as a few months have passed and left feeling so alone and not having much to do or really any people around just one decent friend that i still talk to pretty much daily. Other then that I feel completely alone and like my kids really are all that I have which yes it is not all that bad i at least have them, but is this really all there is anymore? I do not think so. I really would love to have more to do be able to take the kids and have some fun. Even the zoo here sucked last time we went and really how can that work out I always thought zoos were just fun and that was all there was to it. Apparently that is not the case but I do think i will be taking the kids there one day just because Lily had some fun and it gives me an excuse to be able to walk around and not be completely bored.
Well either way, this whole day needs to be restarted and hopefully with a better start but since that will not happen i can hope for a better one tomorrow. Hope everyone else's day has been better and that their week is excellent.
I cannot begin to explain how much it sucks to watch your day wither away but to wake up that late just completely throws my day off. My house looks like a horrible science project or something i mean there is no new anything growing ha ha but there is a lot that needs to be done. I feel overly stressed about the way it looks and kind of embarrassed. Which kind of further hinders the way i feel about doing much. Waiting for some extra energy to come on but it doesn't seem to be coming. This Thursday I will be buying D.E. and see if that will help my energy level and all that to return but who knows anymore. I just keep hoping that maybe a good night sleep will do it for me, but the kids are kind of lacking right now in sleeping well so what kind of fun is this to sleep our whole day out blah.
But on a good note we are talking about trying to get stationed back closer to family. This whole being far away from everyone and not even having my husband around just does not do it for me. At least when he is here it is nice and I don't mind being here. As soon as a few months have passed and left feeling so alone and not having much to do or really any people around just one decent friend that i still talk to pretty much daily. Other then that I feel completely alone and like my kids really are all that I have which yes it is not all that bad i at least have them, but is this really all there is anymore? I do not think so. I really would love to have more to do be able to take the kids and have some fun. Even the zoo here sucked last time we went and really how can that work out I always thought zoos were just fun and that was all there was to it. Apparently that is not the case but I do think i will be taking the kids there one day just because Lily had some fun and it gives me an excuse to be able to walk around and not be completely bored.
Well either way, this whole day needs to be restarted and hopefully with a better start but since that will not happen i can hope for a better one tomorrow. Hope everyone else's day has been better and that their week is excellent.
Monday, December 26, 2011
Parenting OMGs!!!
So, with a 3 year old little girl and her daddy gone and myself taking care of her 4 month old brother I seriously want to know what ever happened to my precious little girl at times. For the most part she is ok but she just the little things that i used to would frown at others for. Yes, I know parenting is not easy but when she goes to get a drink and then throws it onto the couch instead of handing it to me it really makes me wonder where that thought came in to make her think that was ok. The she spilled something on the couch and grabbed a towel, that part is great, but then she threw it at the mess. Now how in the world is that going to work? She finally did get it cleaned up for the most part. Another weird thing is that she is in this phase of she does not like clothes. I have been trying to get her to keep clothes on but I swear she woke up immediately and off with the clothes. I mean really? Top it off, I pretty much have to beg her to put clothes on. I did the best to make her enjoy wearing clothes, but that is another "kids will be kids" topic there.
She is a bit girly and a little miss princess, but if you let her she will love the dirt and mud just as much as her makeup. I pretty much see her as being the girl with her makeup on and cute clothes but loving being outside, almost like her mommy minus the fact I didn't always do my makeup lol. Either way, she is a handful of fun and excitement that I never know what to expect next.
There was a period of every time she would say something new we were shocked, now she just has something new to say every day. I love the fact that she uses big words and, minus the squeaky voice, talks really well. Some people have a hard time understanding her but once you get used to the little mouse voice she actually has a lot to say. She loves to squeal and scream and be loud as much as I love her expressing herself i wished she would remember the difference in inside voice and outside voice. She is getting a lot better with it so only time will tell.
So a commercial was just on for one of those sites that tell you to send in your old gadgets and they will pay you for it, she just told me we don't need any money. So I told her that we always need money but she says we have fun without it, which yes we do. I have done my best to get her to learn that money is not everything but money is important and that we cannot get things if we do not have money. It's another one of those things that we will have to play the waiting game to see how it plays out.
Well, that about sums it up for today. Who knows today just might be a double post day, all depends on how it goes and how I feel come tonight.
She is a bit girly and a little miss princess, but if you let her she will love the dirt and mud just as much as her makeup. I pretty much see her as being the girl with her makeup on and cute clothes but loving being outside, almost like her mommy minus the fact I didn't always do my makeup lol. Either way, she is a handful of fun and excitement that I never know what to expect next.
There was a period of every time she would say something new we were shocked, now she just has something new to say every day. I love the fact that she uses big words and, minus the squeaky voice, talks really well. Some people have a hard time understanding her but once you get used to the little mouse voice she actually has a lot to say. She loves to squeal and scream and be loud as much as I love her expressing herself i wished she would remember the difference in inside voice and outside voice. She is getting a lot better with it so only time will tell.
So a commercial was just on for one of those sites that tell you to send in your old gadgets and they will pay you for it, she just told me we don't need any money. So I told her that we always need money but she says we have fun without it, which yes we do. I have done my best to get her to learn that money is not everything but money is important and that we cannot get things if we do not have money. It's another one of those things that we will have to play the waiting game to see how it plays out.
Well, that about sums it up for today. Who knows today just might be a double post day, all depends on how it goes and how I feel come tonight.
Sunday, December 25, 2011
just to start off
Ok, so I realize that a lot of people will expect this to be grammatically correct and all that fun, however, sorry I am just thinking out loud here and sharing this with whoever might read. Most things that will be put out here will be, for the most part, corrected to the best of my ability. As of right now my husband is deployed and i have two young children, I love them but sometimes they are extremely needy haha.
This new year coming up I am really determined to get the health of my family to where it needs to be. I suffer from a lot of pain so much so that i have been called a hypochondriac, trust me it hurts to no end to be called that especially by some who have called me such. It is also one of the main reasons I put off going to a doctor about it due to the fact I do not want to go to the doctor, with all the preparations I would have to make with the children, just to be told they can not find anything which will probably further feed people and their thoughts of me. Yes, I know with modern medical findings I am sure that it would be figured out. I also do not want any more surgeries then necessary, already had 2 c- sections. It would be my luck that with some of my issues, such as my back, that a doctor would probably want to either medicate or operate both of which I do not want.
With my first child we decided to try and have her early so my husband would be able to be there for the birth since he was due to deploy at the time. She started having complications so that ended with a c-section. I personally would not recommend having a c-section or being induced unless medically necessarily or, I guess, in the situation of the other not being able to be there for something like that it is not healthy for either baby nor mom. I love both of my children, but I would have loved to be able to have them naturally. I know that it is what was meant to be so I accept it and do not have issues with not being able to do that. I will have no more children, least not planned shall I say we all know that accidents do happen. I love children so much but with the two that we did get blessed with, their father has not been able to be there for the whole firsts of that first year and it is hard on both of us.
I would not trade this life for anything. As much as it sucks to be separated like we are for a year or so stretch it is hard but I love and respect my husband for all that he does and would support him in anything he chooses to do. I am not the happiest ever here I like it here ok when he is here with me, however, when he is gone I hate it so much. I would love to be able to go to Ft. Hood and be closer to some family at least all this would be a little easier. The children would be able to have time with the family and not just me every day. I don't ask for much in life just that everyone is happy, that isn't too much is it? Yes, I know it is near impossible for EVERYONE to be happy, but that would be a perfect life.
My husband and I never really had a wedding. It was a quick ride to the court house while we were about 4 days out from having our daughter, he was stationed in Germany so that made it difficult to take care of everything, and a couple of family there and that was it. This was my second marriage, as sad as I am to say, and it was his first so it would have been nice to have the all out nice wedding. It just has not been in the cards for us to have anything all out. We currently have two cars neither of which are too reliable so that makes things fun for me to always be worried something is going to go wrong while I am out with my children, NOT FUN! I already have issues with anxiety and this does not help it one bit. Recently i had to get my daughter a new car seat as she was getting to where she did not like the 5 point harness anymore, and yes I do know that it is safer. However, how safe is it when you have a child saying she does not want to be buckled in? Either way that was taken care of and she is still in an appropriate seat so that is all that really matters and so far she is a lot happier. My son is still in the age of whatever you do is what is going on, 4 month old babies are just easy like that. As long as he is comfy and able to fall asleep that is all he cares about really.
As far as the two children go, they are an awesome blessing. Even when I am stressed and just wanting to sleep they can always make me smile. Who can't honestly say that children do not brighten their day? My son is becoming vocal and it is funny because he wants you to smile and laugh about it. My daughter just loves him she says that is her baby. That is by far the best thing since I was a bit nervous of her being a bit jealous. She informed me a while back that we needed more babies because she needs more babies to love, as sweet as that was it just is not happening.
As far as the cars go a pt cruiser just does not cut it with two young children with needing a stroller at times and just everything that goes with it just no room. Top it off with we have issues with it all the time and never know what it will be next right now there is about a handful of issues. His dodge stratus is more roomy and everything, however, it is so old and needing some tlc that we just can not afford at the moment so that takes off from the roomy part. I would really love to be able to trade my car in and get a chevy equinox. They are just so nice and seem roomy, I have not looked at them other then online, and seem to be awesome on gas compared to what my car gets right now.
Now back on to the getting healthy and all that fun. I have been looking into things to be able to help with getting healthy for myself and the kids, and if the hubby is willing then him too otherwise well idk. I have been researching food grade Diatomaceous Earth and all its functions and whatnot. This, at least from what I have found, seems to be a super amazing and like a miracle kind of thing. Makes you wonder why it is not out there more often however if you are interested in learning more: http://www.morethanalive.com/Diatomaceous-Earth-Food-Grade-Powder and also I have found:
http://www.blogger.com/profile/08985375221228256928 she gives a pretty covered blog on taking it and it seems to at least help with some of the stuff. It might be one of those each person is different so each person might experience something differently. I plan on getting some here soon and start taking it and see if I can get the 4 year old to start as well. She really needs help with getting her immune back up after a 6 month stay at an apartment that we found out had black mold growing in her air vent, which is why we left there. We were so stressed with that and I was beginning to hurt even more living there after a while and my daughter got to where she would not sleep more then maybe a hour at a time in there once we found that we realized why so she was moved into the room with us. Yes, that created it's own issues, but we had to do what we could to help her out. We now live in a house that is not too bad just in my opinion too small and having only one air vent for the living room, dining room, and kitchen as small as they may be is not enough.
It is funny because I am one that gets kind of bored with things and always looking for what would be better so i tend to change the house around as much as possible. My husband was once told that if a woman changes things a lot she is not happy, well I guess I have NEVER been happy because even as a child I would change things around. Sad to say i am regularly asked if I am happy because I want to move something else. Trying to get it through to him that this set up in here just doesn't make me happy and it is not a matter of not being happy in life. I must say with all that has been a part of my life i blocked out a lot of it and so it doesn't really bother me. Yes, there are still somethings that do get to me because of my past, but then again some of it just has to do with things that happen in this day and age. I made comment about wishing I had curly hair and got questioned about my happiness again, I have always wanted curly hair I personally think i look good with curly hair. One day I will have a perm in my hair just trying to get to where I can and also trust someone with my hair because while i wear it up all the time i love my hair and do not want it messed up. The main reason i wear it up is because it is so boring in my opinion one color and flat to me is lame. I want to change that and find the confidence to feel like the beautiful woman i know i am.
Yes, I am all over the place, but just to think this is how my mind normally works. One of the main reasons why i never thought about writing a blog to begin with. Back to the whole pains and back issue now. Since i was in like the 5th grade is as far back as I remember complaining about wrist pains. At that time it was pretty much the only issue and only the one wrist. It later turned into both hands and shoulder and so on. The back pain was never much just if I overdid something but i took a nice fall down about half a flight of marble stairs, needless to say it took about a year for me to have it looked at and when they did the x-ray nothing showed up, takes me back to the whole doctors won't find anything issue. That made me feel even more like maybe it is all in my head so I in turn did my best to ignore all my pains and try to mask it, sad to say it did not work. Obviously it did not work because I do not suffer from anything like that to make me feel as if i have everything in the book and then some wrong with me. I just have a lot of issues and I hate it. I feel like a horrible mother at times because i do not have the energy to keep up or i am hurting so much. Which is one of the things that turned me to the DE it just seems like if it could help with just a little bit i would feel a lot better and be able to keep up and have happier babies because I can get out and play more often. And, also in turn can have more friends probably and keep the ones I do have. I felt horrible last night when my neighbor made comment about how I don't hang out with them anymore. Sad to say that we literally live next door to each other.That is another thing I want to change. Along with getting my weight to where it needs to be so my husband can finally see just what he married. When we met i was not the weight I wanted to be and was not too happy in life, thankfully with all that has changed in life i am so much happier. Well anyway this is the end of my first blog i might need to rethink letting my mind go like this next time but I have been a bit lonely so yea sorry guys!!
This new year coming up I am really determined to get the health of my family to where it needs to be. I suffer from a lot of pain so much so that i have been called a hypochondriac, trust me it hurts to no end to be called that especially by some who have called me such. It is also one of the main reasons I put off going to a doctor about it due to the fact I do not want to go to the doctor, with all the preparations I would have to make with the children, just to be told they can not find anything which will probably further feed people and their thoughts of me. Yes, I know with modern medical findings I am sure that it would be figured out. I also do not want any more surgeries then necessary, already had 2 c- sections. It would be my luck that with some of my issues, such as my back, that a doctor would probably want to either medicate or operate both of which I do not want.
With my first child we decided to try and have her early so my husband would be able to be there for the birth since he was due to deploy at the time. She started having complications so that ended with a c-section. I personally would not recommend having a c-section or being induced unless medically necessarily or, I guess, in the situation of the other not being able to be there for something like that it is not healthy for either baby nor mom. I love both of my children, but I would have loved to be able to have them naturally. I know that it is what was meant to be so I accept it and do not have issues with not being able to do that. I will have no more children, least not planned shall I say we all know that accidents do happen. I love children so much but with the two that we did get blessed with, their father has not been able to be there for the whole firsts of that first year and it is hard on both of us.
I would not trade this life for anything. As much as it sucks to be separated like we are for a year or so stretch it is hard but I love and respect my husband for all that he does and would support him in anything he chooses to do. I am not the happiest ever here I like it here ok when he is here with me, however, when he is gone I hate it so much. I would love to be able to go to Ft. Hood and be closer to some family at least all this would be a little easier. The children would be able to have time with the family and not just me every day. I don't ask for much in life just that everyone is happy, that isn't too much is it? Yes, I know it is near impossible for EVERYONE to be happy, but that would be a perfect life.
My husband and I never really had a wedding. It was a quick ride to the court house while we were about 4 days out from having our daughter, he was stationed in Germany so that made it difficult to take care of everything, and a couple of family there and that was it. This was my second marriage, as sad as I am to say, and it was his first so it would have been nice to have the all out nice wedding. It just has not been in the cards for us to have anything all out. We currently have two cars neither of which are too reliable so that makes things fun for me to always be worried something is going to go wrong while I am out with my children, NOT FUN! I already have issues with anxiety and this does not help it one bit. Recently i had to get my daughter a new car seat as she was getting to where she did not like the 5 point harness anymore, and yes I do know that it is safer. However, how safe is it when you have a child saying she does not want to be buckled in? Either way that was taken care of and she is still in an appropriate seat so that is all that really matters and so far she is a lot happier. My son is still in the age of whatever you do is what is going on, 4 month old babies are just easy like that. As long as he is comfy and able to fall asleep that is all he cares about really.
As far as the two children go, they are an awesome blessing. Even when I am stressed and just wanting to sleep they can always make me smile. Who can't honestly say that children do not brighten their day? My son is becoming vocal and it is funny because he wants you to smile and laugh about it. My daughter just loves him she says that is her baby. That is by far the best thing since I was a bit nervous of her being a bit jealous. She informed me a while back that we needed more babies because she needs more babies to love, as sweet as that was it just is not happening.
As far as the cars go a pt cruiser just does not cut it with two young children with needing a stroller at times and just everything that goes with it just no room. Top it off with we have issues with it all the time and never know what it will be next right now there is about a handful of issues. His dodge stratus is more roomy and everything, however, it is so old and needing some tlc that we just can not afford at the moment so that takes off from the roomy part. I would really love to be able to trade my car in and get a chevy equinox. They are just so nice and seem roomy, I have not looked at them other then online, and seem to be awesome on gas compared to what my car gets right now.
Now back on to the getting healthy and all that fun. I have been looking into things to be able to help with getting healthy for myself and the kids, and if the hubby is willing then him too otherwise well idk. I have been researching food grade Diatomaceous Earth and all its functions and whatnot. This, at least from what I have found, seems to be a super amazing and like a miracle kind of thing. Makes you wonder why it is not out there more often however if you are interested in learning more: http://www.morethanalive.com/Diatomaceous-Earth-Food-Grade-Powder and also I have found:
http://www.blogger.com/profile/08985375221228256928 she gives a pretty covered blog on taking it and it seems to at least help with some of the stuff. It might be one of those each person is different so each person might experience something differently. I plan on getting some here soon and start taking it and see if I can get the 4 year old to start as well. She really needs help with getting her immune back up after a 6 month stay at an apartment that we found out had black mold growing in her air vent, which is why we left there. We were so stressed with that and I was beginning to hurt even more living there after a while and my daughter got to where she would not sleep more then maybe a hour at a time in there once we found that we realized why so she was moved into the room with us. Yes, that created it's own issues, but we had to do what we could to help her out. We now live in a house that is not too bad just in my opinion too small and having only one air vent for the living room, dining room, and kitchen as small as they may be is not enough.
It is funny because I am one that gets kind of bored with things and always looking for what would be better so i tend to change the house around as much as possible. My husband was once told that if a woman changes things a lot she is not happy, well I guess I have NEVER been happy because even as a child I would change things around. Sad to say i am regularly asked if I am happy because I want to move something else. Trying to get it through to him that this set up in here just doesn't make me happy and it is not a matter of not being happy in life. I must say with all that has been a part of my life i blocked out a lot of it and so it doesn't really bother me. Yes, there are still somethings that do get to me because of my past, but then again some of it just has to do with things that happen in this day and age. I made comment about wishing I had curly hair and got questioned about my happiness again, I have always wanted curly hair I personally think i look good with curly hair. One day I will have a perm in my hair just trying to get to where I can and also trust someone with my hair because while i wear it up all the time i love my hair and do not want it messed up. The main reason i wear it up is because it is so boring in my opinion one color and flat to me is lame. I want to change that and find the confidence to feel like the beautiful woman i know i am.
Yes, I am all over the place, but just to think this is how my mind normally works. One of the main reasons why i never thought about writing a blog to begin with. Back to the whole pains and back issue now. Since i was in like the 5th grade is as far back as I remember complaining about wrist pains. At that time it was pretty much the only issue and only the one wrist. It later turned into both hands and shoulder and so on. The back pain was never much just if I overdid something but i took a nice fall down about half a flight of marble stairs, needless to say it took about a year for me to have it looked at and when they did the x-ray nothing showed up, takes me back to the whole doctors won't find anything issue. That made me feel even more like maybe it is all in my head so I in turn did my best to ignore all my pains and try to mask it, sad to say it did not work. Obviously it did not work because I do not suffer from anything like that to make me feel as if i have everything in the book and then some wrong with me. I just have a lot of issues and I hate it. I feel like a horrible mother at times because i do not have the energy to keep up or i am hurting so much. Which is one of the things that turned me to the DE it just seems like if it could help with just a little bit i would feel a lot better and be able to keep up and have happier babies because I can get out and play more often. And, also in turn can have more friends probably and keep the ones I do have. I felt horrible last night when my neighbor made comment about how I don't hang out with them anymore. Sad to say that we literally live next door to each other.That is another thing I want to change. Along with getting my weight to where it needs to be so my husband can finally see just what he married. When we met i was not the weight I wanted to be and was not too happy in life, thankfully with all that has changed in life i am so much happier. Well anyway this is the end of my first blog i might need to rethink letting my mind go like this next time but I have been a bit lonely so yea sorry guys!!
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)